91
2/16/2025
Get in Loser We're Going Slapping
Deck Size: 100
Commander
Legal
Est deck cost: $141.44
Salt sum: 30.31
91
2/16/2025
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Commander

Qty: 1 Price: $3.99
Eriette of the Charmed Apple

Each creature that's enchanted by an Aura you control can't attack you or planeswalkers you control. At the beginning of your end step, each opponent loses X life and you gain X life, where X is the number of Auras you control.

Creature
Eriette of the Charmed Apple (woe) 202

Commander

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Land

Qty: 33 (34 w/ MDFC)Price: $20.61
Bojuka Bog

This land enters tapped. When this land enters, exile target player's graveyard. {T}: Add {B}.

Land
Bojuka Bog (lcc) 320
Command Tower

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Land
Command Tower (moc) 396
Exotic Orchard

{T}: Add one mana of any color that a land an opponent controls could produce.

Land
Exotic Orchard (mic) 173
Field of Ruin

{T}: Add {C}. {2}, {T}, Sacrifice this land: Destroy target nonbasic land an opponent controls. Each player searches their library for a basic land card, puts it onto the battlefield, then shuffles.

Land
Field of Ruin (mid) 262
Goldmire Bridge

This land enters tapped. Indestructible {T}: Add {W} or {B}.

Artifact Land
Goldmire Bridge (moc) 407
Leechridden Swamp

({T}: Add {B}.) This land enters tapped. {B}, {T}: Each opponent loses 1 life. Activate only if you control two or more black permanents.

Land
Leechridden Swamp (hop) 135
Myriad Landscape

This land enters tapped. {T}: Add {C}. {2}, {T}, Sacrifice this land: Search your library for up to two basic land cards that share a land type, put them onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.

Land
Myriad Landscape (mic) 177
Orzhov Guildgate

This land enters tapped. {T}: Add {W} or {B}.

Land
Orzhov Guildgate (rvr) 282
Path of Ancestry

This land enters tapped. {T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity. When that mana is spent to cast a creature spell that shares a creature type with your commander, scry 1. (Look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom.)

Land
Path of Ancestry (onc) 161
Plains

({T}: Add {W}.)

Land
Plains (cmm) 786
Rogue's Passage

{T}: Add {C}. {4}, {T}: Target creature can't be blocked this turn.

Land
Rogue's Passage (lcc) 349
Shineshadow Snarl

As this land enters, you may reveal a Plains or Swamp card from your hand. If you don't, this land enters tapped. {T}: Add {W} or {B}.

Land
Shineshadow Snarl (lcc) 351
Silverquill Campus

This land enters tapped. {T}: Add {W} or {B}. {4}, {T}: Scry 1.

Land
Silverquill Campus (moc) 423
Swamp

({T}: Add {B}.)

Land
Swamp (mid) 382
Tainted Field

{T}: Add {C}. {T}: Add {W} or {B}. Activate only if you control a Swamp.

Land
Tainted Field (lcc) 356
Temple of Silence

This land enters tapped. When this land enters, scry 1. (Look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom.) {T}: Add {W} or {B}.

Land
Temple of Silence (lcc) 358
Thriving Heath

This land enters tapped. As it enters, choose a color other than white. {T}: Add {W} or one mana of the chosen color.

Land
Thriving Heath (moc) 440
Throne of the High City

{T}: Add {C}. {4}, {T}, Sacrifice this land: You become the monarch.

Land
Throne of the High City (ltc) 339
Valgavoth's Lair

Hexproof This land enters tapped. As it enters, choose a color. {T}: Add one mana of the chosen color.

Land Enchantment
Valgavoth's Lair (dsk) 271
Vault of the Archangel

{T}: Add {C}. {2}{W}{B}, {T}: Creatures you control gain deathtouch and lifelink until end of turn.

Land
Vault of the Archangel (moc) 443

Land

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Recursion

Qty: 4 Price: $11.18
Animate Dead

Enchant creature card in a graveyard When this Aura enters, if it's on the battlefield, it loses "enchant creature card in a graveyard" and gains "enchant creature put onto the battlefield with this Aura." Return enchanted creature card to the battlefield under your control and attach this Aura to it. When this Aura leaves the battlefield, that creature's controller sacrifices it. Enchanted creature gets -1/-0.

Enchantment
Animate Dead (3ed) 93
Kaervek, the Punisher

Whenever you commit a crime, exile up to one target black card from your graveyard and copy it. You may cast the copy. If you do, you lose 2 life. (Targeting opponents, anything they control, and/or cards in their graveyards is a crime. Copies of permanent spells become tokens.)

Creature
Kaervek, the Punisher (otj) 92
Neva, Stalked by Nightmares

Menace When Neva enters, return target creature or enchantment card from your graveyard to your hand. Whenever an enchantment you control is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, put a +1/+1 counter on Neva, then scry 1.

Creature
Neva, Stalked by Nightmares (woe) 209
Raffine's Guidance

Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +1/+1. You may cast this card from your graveyard by paying {2}{W} rather than paying its mana cost.

Enchantment
Raffine's Guidance (snc) 25

Recursion

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Drain

Qty: 2 Price: $5.84
Kambal, Profiteering Mayor

Whenever one or more tokens your opponents control enter, for each of them, create a tapped token that's a copy of it. This ability triggers only once each turn. Whenever one or more tokens you control enter, each opponent loses 1 life and you gain 1 life.

Creature
Kambal, Profiteering Mayor (otj) 211
Marauding Blight-Priest

Whenever you gain life, each opponent loses 1 life.

Creature
Marauding Blight-Priest (znr) 112

Drain

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Lifegain

Qty: 4 Price: $27.66
Ajani's Pridemate

Whenever you gain life, put a +1/+1 counter on this creature.

Creature
Ajani's Pridemate (m11) 3
Exquisite Blood

Whenever an opponent loses life, you gain that much life.

Enchantment
Exquisite Blood (lcc) 195
Leyline of Hope

If this card is in your opening hand, you may begin the game with it on the battlefield. If you would gain life, you gain that much life plus 1 instead. As long as you have at least 7 life more than your starting life total, creatures you control get +2/+2.

Enchantment
Leyline of Hope (dsk) 18
Voice of the Blessed

Whenever you gain life, put a +1/+1 counter on this creature. As long as this creature has four or more +1/+1 counters on it, it has flying and vigilance. As long as this creature has ten or more +1/+1 counters on it, it has indestructible.

Creature
Voice of the Blessed (vow) 44

Lifegain

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Removal

Qty: 16 Price: $24.68
Bonds of Faith

Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +2/+2 as long as it's a Human. Otherwise, it can't attack or block.

Enchantment
Bonds of Faith (isd) 5
Curse of Conformity

Enchant player Nonlegendary creatures enchanted player controls have base power and toughness 3/3 and lose all creature types.

Enchantment
Curse of Conformity (mic) 6
Dead Weight

Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets -2/-2.

Enchantment
Dead Weight (lci) 99
Final Showdown

Spree (Choose one or more additional costs.) + {1} — All creatures lose all abilities until end of turn. + {1} — Choose a creature you control. It gains indestructible until end of turn. + {3}{W}{W} — Destroy all creatures.

Instant
Final Showdown (otj) 11
Lithoform Blight

Enchant land When this Aura enters, draw a card. Enchanted land loses all land types and abilities and has "{T}: Add {C}" and "{T}, Pay 1 life: Add one mana of any color."

Enchantment
Lithoform Blight (znr) 109
Morgul-Knife Wound

Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets -3/-0 and has "At the beginning of your upkeep, exile this creature unless you pay 2 life."

Enchantment
Morgul-Knife Wound (ltr) 98
Nowhere to Run

Flash When this enchantment enters, target creature an opponent controls gets -3/-3 until end of turn. Creatures your opponents control can be the targets of spells and abilities as though they didn't have hexproof. Ward abilities of those creatures don't trigger.

Enchantment
Nowhere to Run (dsk) 111
Ossification

Enchant basic land you control When this Aura enters, exile target creature or planeswalker an opponent controls until this Aura leaves the battlefield.

Enchantment
Ossification (one) 26
Petrify

Enchant artifact or creature Enchanted permanent can't attack or block, and its activated abilities can't be activated.

Enchantment
Petrify (lci) 30
Planar Disruption

Enchant artifact, creature, or planeswalker Enchanted permanent can't attack or block, and its activated abilities can't be activated.

Enchantment
Planar Disruption (one) 28
Prison Term

Enchant creature Enchanted creature can't attack or block, and its activated abilities can't be activated. Whenever a creature an opponent controls enters, you may attach this Aura to that creature.

Enchantment
Prison Term (hop) 6
Realmbreaker's Grasp

Enchant artifact or creature Enchanted permanent can't attack or block, and its activated abilities can't be activated unless they're mana abilities.

Enchantment
Realmbreaker's Grasp (mom) 33
Sheltered by Ghosts

Enchant creature you control When this Aura enters, exile target nonland permanent an opponent controls until this Aura leaves the battlefield. Enchanted creature gets +1/+0 and has lifelink and ward {2}.

Enchantment
Sheltered by Ghosts (dsk) 30
Stab Wound

Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets -2/-2. At the beginning of the upkeep of enchanted creature's controller, that player loses 2 life.

Enchantment
Stab Wound (rvr) 93
Utter End

Exile target nonland permanent.

Instant
Utter End (lcc) 292
Vengeful Strangler

Creature
Vengeful Strangler // Strangling Grasp (mid) 126Vengeful Strangler // Strangling Grasp (mid) 126

Removal

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Draw

Qty: 12 Price: $18.02
Ashiok's Reaper

Whenever an enchantment you control is put into a graveyard from the battlefield, draw a card.

Creature
Ashiok's Reaper (woe) 79
Derelict Attic

Enchantment
Derelict Attic // Widow's Walk (dsk) 93
Feather of Flight

Flash Enchant creature When this Aura enters, draw a card. Enchanted creature gets +1/+0 and has flying.

Enchantment
Feather of Flight (blb) 13
Kor Spiritdancer

This creature gets +2/+2 for each Aura attached to it. Whenever you cast an Aura spell, you may draw a card.

Creature
Kor Spiritdancer (roe) 31
Necrosynthesis

Enchant creature Enchanted creature has "Whenever another creature dies, put a +1/+1 counter on this creature." When enchanted creature dies, look at the top X cards of your library, where X is its power. Put one of those cards into your hand and the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order.

Enchantment
Necrosynthesis (mid) 115
Night's Whisper

You draw two cards and you lose 2 life.

Sorcery
Night's Whisper (moc) 259
Pearl-Ear, Imperial Advisor

Lifelink Enchantment spells you cast have affinity for Auras. (They cost {1} less to cast for each Aura you control.) Whenever you cast an Aura spell that targets a modified permanent you control, draw a card. (Equipment, Auras you control, and counters are modifications.)

Creature
Pearl-Ear, Imperial Advisor (mh3) 39
Phyrexian Arena

At the beginning of your upkeep, you draw a card and you lose 1 life.

Enchantment
Phyrexian Arena (one) 104
Read the Bones

Scry 2, then draw two cards. You lose 2 life. (To scry 2, look at the top two cards of your library, then put any number of them on the bottom and the rest on top in any order.)

Sorcery
Read the Bones (cmm) 182
Slumbering Keepguard

Whenever an enchantment you control enters, scry 1. {2}{W}: This creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each enchantment you control.

Creature
Slumbering Keepguard (woe) 29
Syphon Mind

Each other player discards a card. You draw a card for each card discarded this way.

Sorcery
Syphon Mind (hop) 42
Tenuous Truce

Enchant opponent At the beginning of enchanted opponent's end step, you and that player each draw a card. When you attack enchanted opponent or a planeswalker they control or when they attack you or a planeswalker you control, sacrifice this Aura.

Enchantment
Tenuous Truce (ncc) 87

Draw

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Protection

Qty: 8 Price: $5.50
Bastion Protector

Commander creatures you control get +2/+2 and have indestructible.

Creature
Bastion Protector (mic) 80
Dog Umbra

Flash Enchant creature As long as another player controls enchanted creature, it can't attack or block. Otherwise, this Aura has umbra armor. (If enchanted creature would be destroyed, instead remove all damage from it and destroy this Aura.)

Enchantment
Dog Umbra (mh3) 22
Fungal Fortitude

Flash Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +2/+0. When enchanted creature dies, return it to the battlefield tapped under its owner's control.

Enchantment
Fungal Fortitude (lci) 106
Karmic Justice

Whenever a spell or ability an opponent controls destroys a noncreature permanent you control, you may destroy target permanent that opponent controls.

Enchantment
Karmic Justice (wot) 7
Not Dead After All

Until end of turn, target creature you control gains "When this creature dies, return it to the battlefield tapped under its owner's control, then create a Wicked Role token attached to it." (Enchanted creature gets +1/+1. When this token is put into a graveyard, each opponent loses 1 life.)

Instant
Not Dead After All (woe) 101
Pariah

Enchant creature All damage that would be dealt to you is dealt to enchanted creature instead.

Enchantment
Pariah (otp) 5
Shardmage's Rescue

Flash Enchant creature you control As long as this Aura entered this turn, enchanted creature has hexproof. Enchanted creature gets +1/+1.

Enchantment
Shardmage's Rescue (dsk) 29
Sun Clasp

Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +1/+3. {W}: Return enchanted creature to its owner's hand.

Enchantment
Sun Clasp (dmr) 30

Protection

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Tokens

Qty: 5 Price: $2.13
Cathar's Call

Enchant creature Enchanted creature has vigilance and "At the beginning of your end step, create a 1/1 white Human creature token."

Enchantment
Cathar's Call (mid) 11
Ghostly Dancers

Flying When this creature enters, return an enchantment card from your graveyard to your hand or unlock a locked door of a Room you control. Eerie — Whenever an enchantment you control enters and whenever you fully unlock a Room, create a 3/1 white Spirit creature token with flying.

Creature
Ghostly Dancers (dsk) 302
Griffin Aerie

At the beginning of your end step, if you gained 3 or more life this turn, create a 2/2 white Griffin creature token with flying.

Enchantment
Griffin Aerie (wot) 5
Knightly Valor

Enchant creature When this Aura enters, create a 2/2 white Knight creature token with vigilance. (Attacking doesn't cause it to tap.) Enchanted creature gets +2/+2 and has vigilance.

Enchantment
Knightly Valor (wot) 8
Spellbook Vendor

Vigilance At the beginning of combat on your turn, you may pay {1}. When you do, create a Sorcerer Role token attached to target creature you control. (If you control another Role on it, put that one into the graveyard. Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 and has "Whenever this creature attacks, scry 1.")

Creature
Spellbook Vendor (woe) 31

Tokens

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Evasion

Qty: 1 Price: $3.99
Armored Ascension

Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 for each Plains you control and has flying.

Enchantment
Armored Ascension (m10) 3

Evasion

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Pump

Qty: 4 Price: $1.88
Due Diligence

Enchant creature When this Aura enters, target creature you control other than enchanted creature gets +2/+2 and gains vigilance until end of turn. Enchanted creature gets +2/+2 and has vigilance.

Enchantment
Due Diligence (mkm) 14
Ethereal Armor

Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 for each enchantment you control and has first strike.

Enchantment
Ethereal Armor (dsk) 7
Glasswing Grace

Enchantment
Glasswing Grace // Age-Graced Chapel (mh3) 254Glasswing Grace // Age-Graced Chapel (mh3) 254
Zealot's Conviction

Flash Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +1/+1. Corrupted — As long as an opponent has three or more poison counters, enchanted creature gets an additional +1/+0 and has first strike.

Enchantment
Zealot's Conviction (one) 39

Pump

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Tutor

Qty: 1 Price: $5.99
Insatiable Avarice

Spree (Choose one or more additional costs.) + {2} — Search your library for a card, then shuffle and put that card on top. + {B}{B} — Target player draws three cards and loses 3 life.

Sorcery
Insatiable Avarice (otj) 91

Tutor

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Infect

Qty: 1 Price: $1.29
Phyresis

Enchant creature Enchanted creature has infect. (It deals damage to creatures in the form of -1/-1 counters and to players in the form of poison counters.)

Enchantment
Phyresis (mbs) 49

Infect

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Ramp

Qty: 8 Price: $8.68
Arcane Signet

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Artifact
Arcane Signet (onc) 125
Commander's Sphere

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity. Sacrifice this artifact: Draw a card.

Artifact
Commander's Sphere (lcc) 301
Fellwar Stone

{T}: Add one mana of any color that a land an opponent controls could produce.

Artifact
Fellwar Stone (cmm) 382
Mind Stone

{T}: Add {C}. {1}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Draw a card.

Artifact
Mind Stone (moc) 364
Orzhov Signet

{1}, {T}: Add {W}{B}.

Artifact
Orzhov Signet (lcc) 310
Sol Ring

{T}: Add {C}{C}.

Artifact
Sol Ring (cmm) 410
Solemn Simulacrum

When this creature enters, you may search your library for a basic land card, put that card onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle. When this creature dies, you may draw a card.

Creature Artifact
Solemn Simulacrum (pm21) 239p
Weathered Wayfarer

{W}, {T}: Search your library for a land card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle. Activate only if an opponent controls more lands than you.

Creature
Weathered Wayfarer (ltc) 183

Ramp

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Deck Info

Deck stats

45 pips - 39 cards
24 mana - 24 cards
0 pips - 0 cards
0 mana - 7 cards
30 pips - 26 cards
24 mana - 24 cards
0 pips - 0 cards
0 mana - 7 cards
0 pips - 0 cards
0 mana - 7 cards
0 pips - 0 cards
10 mana - 9 cards
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Description

{"ops":[{"attributes":{"bold":true},"insert":"Start a clique "},{"insert":"by enchanting all the coolest creatures and watch them slap each other while you gain and drain. Use your buff enchantments where needed, to either give your opponents big hitters that can't attack you or to pad your defences. Eventually your life gain and drain will become large enough to win the game.\n\nKey Plays:\nProtect Eriette with auras like "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Dog Umbra"}},{"insert":" and instants like "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Not Dead After All"}},{"insert":" so you remain untouchable as you buff your opponents' hitters with "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Ethereal Armor"}},{"insert":" ."},{"attributes":{"list":"bullet"},"insert":"\n"},{"insert":"Try not to buff a single opponent's creature too much or you'll be helpless if Eriette is removed."},{"attributes":{"list":"bullet"},"insert":"\n"},{"insert":"Be careful not to end the game too early with "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Phyresis"}},{"insert":" but there is a sole corrupted synergy with "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Zealot's Conviction"}},{"insert":" to keep an eye out for."},{"attributes":{"list":"bullet"},"insert":"\n"},{"insert":"Another early win is the infinite combo with "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Marauding Blight-Priest"}},{"insert":" and "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Exquisite Blood"}},{"insert":" which will likely trigger on your end step if you have Eriette out."},{"attributes":{"list":"bullet"},"insert":"\n"},{"insert":"There are some life-gain synergies in "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Ajani's Pridemate"}},{"insert":" and "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Voice of the Blessed"}},{"insert":" but only to give you a couple of strong blocks."},{"attributes":{"list":"bullet"},"insert":"\n"},{"insert":"Most of the deck operates on enchantment and aura synergies such as "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Slumbering Keepguard"}},{"insert":" and "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Pearl-Ear, Imperial Advisor"}},{"insert":" to generate value and strength."},{"attributes":{"list":"bullet"},"insert":"\n"},{"insert":{"card-link":"Kaervek, the Punisher"}},{"insert":" will trigger whenever you enchant an opponent's creature so keep an eye out for some recurrable auras."},{"attributes":{"list":"bullet"},"insert":"\n"},{"insert":"Protect your auras with "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Karmic Justice"}},{"insert":" and your life total with "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Pariah"}},{"insert":" ."},{"attributes":{"list":"bullet"},"insert":"\n"},{"insert":{"card-link":"Nowhere to Run"}},{"insert":" should ensure you always have targets."},{"attributes":{"list":"bullet"},"insert":"\n"},{"insert":"Another oppressive move is attaching "},{"insert":{"card-link":"Vengeful Strangler // Strangling Grasp"}},{"insert":" to a land-creature so it is not sacrificable to it's own trigger and the owner must sacrifice another creature on each of their turns."},{"attributes":{"list":"bullet"},"insert":"\n"},{"insert":"\nP\t\t\tW\t\tL\t\t\tD\t\t%\n0\t\t\t0\t\t\t0\t\t\t0\t\t\t0\n"}]}
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