Garbage Elemental

Last strike (This creature deals combat damage after creatures without last strike.)
Battalion — Whenever Garbage Elemental and at least two other creatures attack, target creature can't block this turn.

Mer Man

When this creature enters, you may draw a card.

Big Boa Constrictor

When this creature enters, roll a six-sided die. Target opponent loses life equal to the result.

Success!

Target creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn. If it's a host or has augment, it gains lifelink until end of turn.

Baron Von Count

Baron Von Count enters with a doom counter on "5."
Whenever you cast a spell with the indicated numeral in its mana cost, text box, power, or toughness, move the doom counter one numeral to the left.
When the doom counter moves from "1," destroy target player and put that doom counter on "5."

Dispatch Dispensary

Whenever you crank Dispatch Dispensary, create a 2/2 black Rogue creature token with menace.

Voracious Vacuum

When this creature enters, put a +1/+1 counter on target creature.

Hangman

As Hangman enters, secretly note a word with six to eight letters.
{1}: Target player who doesn't control Hangman guesses the noted word or an unguessed letter in that word. If they guess wrong, put a +1/+1 counter on Hangman. Any player may activate this ability.
When a player guesses the noted word or all of its letters, sacrifice Hangman.

Mary O'Kill

{1}{B/R}: Switch a Killbot or Mary O'Kill in your hand with one on the battlefield. (If a creature is tapped, the switched creature is tapped. The same is true for untapped, attacking, blocking, enchanted, equipped, and targeted. Any counters on a creature are on the switched creature instead.)

Painiac

At the beginning of your upkeep, roll a six-sided die. Painiac gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is the result.

Jamming Device

Whenever you crank Jamming Device, creatures target player controls get -1/-1 until end of turn.

Half-Squirrel, Half-

Whenever a nontoken creature enters,
Augment {G} ({G}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Extremely Slow Zombie

Last strike (This creature deals combat damage after creatures without last strike.)

The Big Idea

{2}{B/R}{B/R}, {T}: Roll a six-sided die. Create a number of 1/1 red Brainiac creature tokens equal to the result.
Tap three untapped Brainiacs you control: The next time you would roll a six-sided die, instead roll two six-sided dice and use the total of those results.

Knight of the Kitchen Sink

First strike, protection from even collector numbers (Nothing with an even collector number can block, target, deal damage to, or attach to this creature.)

Steamfloggery

Roll a six-sided die. Assemble a number of Contraptions equal to the result. (To assemble a Contraption, put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Zombified

{4}{B}: Combine Zombified from your graveyard with target host.
{2}{B}, Exile a creature card from your graveyard:
Augment {4}{B} ({4}{B}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Druid of the Sacred Beaker

{T}: Add {G} for each Crossbreed Labs watermark among permanents you control.

Kindslaver

{5}, {T}, Sacrifice Kindslaver: A person outside the game controls target player during that player's next turn. Neither player may advise that person until the end of that turn.

Twiddlestick Charger

Whenever you crank Twiddlestick Charger, tap or untap target creature.

Crafty Octopus

When this creature enters, this creature assembles a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

The Grand Calcutron

The Grand Calcutron can be your commander.
When The Grand Calcutron enters, each player's hand becomes a program (an ordered row of revealed cards).
Players can only play the first card of their program.
If a card would be put into a player's hand from anywhere, that player reveals it and places it anywhere within their program instead.
At the beginning of each player's end step, if that player's program has fewer than five cards, they draw cards equal to the difference.

capital offense

target creature gets -x/-x until end of turn, where x is the number of times a capital letter appears in its rules text. (ignore reminder text and flavor text.)

Insufferable Syphon

Whenever you crank Insufferable Syphon, target player discards a card.

Work a Double

Assemble two Contraptions. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets. Then repeat this process.)

Spy Eye

Flying
Whenever Spy Eye deals combat damage to a player, you may draw a card from that player's library.

Tread Mill

Whenever you crank Tread Mill, until end of turn, target creature gets +1/+2, gains vigilance, and becomes an artifact in addition to its other types.

Mad Science Fair Project

{T}: Roll a six-sided die. On a 3 or lower, target player adds {C}. Otherwise, that player adds one mana of any color they choose.

Oddly Uneven

Choose one —
• Destroy each creature with an odd number of words in its name. (Hyphenated words are one word.)
• Destroy each creature with an even number of words in its name.

Inhumaniac

At the beginning of your upkeep, roll a six-sided die. On a 3 or 4, put a +1/+1 counter on Inhumaniac. On a 5 or higher, put two +1/+1 counters on it. On a 1, remove all +1/+1 counters from Inhumaniac.

Turbo-Thwacking Auto-Hammer

Whenever you crank Turbo-Thwacking Auto-Hammer, target creature gains double strike until end of turn.

Oaken Power Suit

Whenever you crank Oaken Power Suit, target creature gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the greatest power among creatures you control.

Record Store

Whenever you crank Record Store, look at the top X cards of your library, where X is the number of artifacts you control. Put one of those cards into your hand and the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order.

By Gnome Means

{1}{W}, Remove a counter from a permanent you control: Create a 1/1 colorless Gnome artifact creature token.
{1}{W}, Sacrifice an artifact: Choose any kind of counter a printed card refers to, then put one of that counter on target permanent.

Animate Library

Enchant your library
Enchanted library is an artifact creature on the battlefield with power and toughness each equal to the number of cards in it. It's still a library.
If enchanted library would leave the battlefield, exile Animate Library instead.

As Luck Would Have It

Hexproof
Whenever you roll a die, put a number of luck counters on As Luck Would Have It equal to the result. Then if there are 100 or more luck counters on As Luck Would Have It, you win the game. (Count both rolls if you reroll a die.)

Division Table

Whenever you crank Division Table, target player loses 2 life.

Guest List

Whenever you crank Guest List, target creature gets -X/-X until end of turn, where X is the number of creature cards in its controller's graveyard.

Robo-

At the beginning of each end step, if an artifact entered the battlefield under your control this turn,
Augment {2} ({2}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Clock of DOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

{4}, {T}: Move the CRANK! counter to your Contraption deck's next sprocket and crank any number of that sprocket's Contraptions.

Hydradoodle

As Hydradoodle enters, roll X six-sided dice. Hydradoodle enters with a number of +1/+1 counters on it equal to the total of those results.
Reach, trample

Genetic Recombinator

Whenever you crank Genetic Recombinator, up to two target creatures each get +2/+2 until end of turn.

Really Epic Punch

Target creature you control gets +2/+2 if it's a host or has augment. Then it fights target creature you don't control.

Sundering Fork

Whenever you crank Sundering Fork, destroy target artifact.

Delighted Killbot

Multi-Headed

At the beginning of each end step, if you rolled a die this turn,
Augment {4}{G} ({4}{G}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Hypnotic Swirly Disc

Whenever you crank Hypnotic Swirly Disc, target player mills X cards, where X is the number of creatures you control.

"Rumors of My Death . . ."

{3}{B}, Exile a permanent you control with a League of Dastardly Doom watermark: Return a permanent card with a League of Dastardly Doom watermark from your graveyard to the battlefield.

Labro Bot

When this creature enters, return target host card or card with augment from your graveyard to your hand.

Subcontract

A person outside the game looks at target opponent's hand and chooses a nonland card from it. That player discards that card.

Proper Laboratory Attire

Equipped creature gets +2/+1 and has protection from die rolls. (Nothing that lets a player roll a die can block, target, deal damage to, or attach to equipped creature.)
Equip {2}

Steam-Powered

{5}:
Augment {4} ({4}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Dual Doomsuits

Whenever you crank Dual Doomsuits, each time a source you control would deal damage this turn, it deals double that damage instead.

Handy Dandy Clone Machine

{2}, {T}: Create a 2/2 colorless Homunculus creature token. It must be represented by a unique hand and two fingers at all times, or it ceases to exist.

Bumbling Pangolin

When this creature enters, you may destroy target artifact.

Suspicious Nanny

Whenever Suspicious Nanny deals combat damage to a player, it reassembles target Contraption that player controls. (Gain control of it and move it onto one of your sprockets.)

Wrench-Rigger

When Wrench-Rigger enters, it assembles a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Incite Insight

Assemble X Contraptions. (To assemble a Contraption, put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Knight of the Widget

Vigilance
Knight of the Widget's power and toughness are each equal to the number of Order of the Widget watermarks among permanents you control.

Crow Storm

Create a 1/2 blue Bird creature token with flying named Storm Crow.
Storm (When you cast this spell, copy it for each spell cast before it this turn.)

Half-Kitten, Half-

Whenever you're dealt damage,
Augment {2}{W} ({2}{W}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Buzzing Whack-a-Doodle

As Buzzing Whack-a-Doodle enters, you and an opponent each secretly choose Whack or Doodle. Then those choices are revealed. If the choices match, Buzzing Whack-a-Doodle has that ability. Otherwise, it has Buzz.
• Whack — {T}: Target player loses 2 life.
• Doodle — {T}: You gain 3 life.
• Buzz — {2}, {T}: Draw a card.

Hot Fix

You have ten seconds to look at and rearrange the cards in your library. At the end of those ten seconds, if you're touching one or more of those cards, shuffle.

Bee-Bee Gun

Whenever you crank Bee-Bee Gun, until end of turn, target creature gains "{2}: This creature fights another target creature."

Cramped Bunker

At the beginning of each opponent's upkeep, that player moves a permanent they control to touch Cramped Bunker and no other permanents. If the player can't, destroy each permanent they control that isn't touching Cramped Bunker, then sacrifice it.

Wild Crocodile

When this creature enters, search your library for a basic land card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Split Screen

When Split Screen enters, shuffle your library and deal it into four libraries. If anything refers to your library, choose one of your libraries for it.
Play with your libraries' top cards revealed.
When Split Screen leaves the battlefield, shuffle your libraries together.

Thud-for-Duds

Whenever you crank Thud-for-Duds, roll two six-sided dice. Thud-for-Duds deals damage to target creature equal to the difference between those results.

Sword of Dungeons & Dragons

Equipped creature gets +2/+2 and has protection from Rogues and from Clerics.
Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, create a 4/4 gold Dragon creature token with flying and roll a d20 (a twenty-sided die). If you roll a 20, repeat this process.
Equip {2}

Joyride Rigger

When Joyride Rigger enters, it assembles a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Ineffable Blessing

As Ineffable Blessing enters, choose a number.
Whenever a creature you control with exactly the chosen number of words in its name enters, draw a card. (Hyphenated words are one word.)

The Countdown Is at One

Players play a Magic subgame, starting at 1 life and using their libraries as their decks. For the rest of the main game, if a source would deal damage to a player who didn't win the subgame, it deals double that damage to that player instead.

Overt Operative

Menace
Whenever Overt Operative deals combat damage to a player, it assembles a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Targeting Rocket

Whenever you crank Targeting Rocket, target creature blocks this turn if able.

Chittering Doom

Whenever you roll a 4 or higher on a die, create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token.

Accessories to Murder

Whenever you crank Accessories to Murder, target creature gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is the number of creatures you control.

Rapid Prototyper

Whenever you crank Rapid Prototyper, create an X/X colorless Construct artifact creature token, where X is the number of artifacts you control.

Angelic Rocket

Flying
When this creature enters, you may destroy target nonland permanent.

Wall of Fortune

Defender
You may tap an untapped Wall you control to have any player reroll a die that player rolled.

Dogsnail Engine

Whenever you crank Dogsnail Engine, target player gains life equal to the greatest power among creatures you control.

Refibrillator

Whenever you crank Refibrillator, return target creature card from your graveyard to your hand.

Adorable Kitten

When this creature enters, roll a six-sided die. You gain life equal to the result.

Rhino-

Whenever this creature blocks,
Augment {3}{W} ({3}{W}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Ordinary Pony

When this creature enters, you may exile target non-Horse creature you control that wasn't put onto the battlefield with this ability this turn, then return it to the battlefield under its owner's control.

Spell Suck

Counter target spell, then assemble a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Modular Monstrosity

Whenever an opponent casts a spell, you have five seconds to choose a keyword you haven't chosen for a card named Modular Monstrosity today that's been printed on a creature card. If you do, Modular Monstrosity gains that ability. Otherwise, Modular Monstrosity loses all keyword abilities.

Hammer Jammer

As Hammer Jammer enters, roll a six-sided die. Hammer Jammer enters with a number of +1/+1 counters on it equal to the result.
Whenever you roll a die, remove all +1/+1 counters from Hammer Jammer, then put a number of +1/+1 counters on it equal to the result.

Hammerfest Boomtacular

Whenever you cast a spell with a Goblin Explosioneers watermark, Hammerfest Boomtacular deals 2 damage to any target.

Feisty Stegosaurus

When this creature enters, roll a six-sided die. This creature deals damage equal to the result to target creature an opponent controls.

Hammer Helper

Gain control of target creature until end of turn. Untap that creature and roll a six-sided die. Until end of turn, it gains haste and gets +X/+0, where X is the result.

Willing Test Subject

Reach
Whenever you roll a 4 or higher on a die, put a +1/+1 counter on Willing Test Subject.
{6}: Roll a six-sided die.

Humming-

Flying
Whenever you attack with two or more creatures,
Augment {3}{W} ({3}{W}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Eager Beaver

When this creature enters, you may untap target permanent.

Staff of the Letter Magus

As Staff of the Letter Magus enters, choose a consonant other than N, R, S, or T.
Whenever a player casts a spell, you gain 1 life for each time the chosen letter appears in that spell's name.

Sacrifice Play

A person outside the game chooses an attacking or blocking creature target opponent controls. That player sacrifices that creature.

Riveting Rigger

When Riveting Rigger enters, you may sacrifice another artifact. If you do, put two +1/+1 counters on Riveting Rigger and it assembles a Contraption. (Put the top card of your Contraption deck face up onto one of your sprockets.)

Old Guard

{W}, {T}: Tap target creature without reminder text. (Reminder text is still any italicized text in parentheses that explains rules you already know.)

Shellephant

{0}: Choose one. You may activate this ability while Shellephant is in any zone.
• Shellephant has base power and toughness 1/4.
• Shellephant has base power and toughness 3/3.

Goblin Slingshot

Whenever you crank Goblin Slingshot, creatures you control get +2/+0 and gain trample until end of turn.

Infinity Elemental

Quick-Stick Lick Trick

Whenever you crank Quick-Stick Lick Trick, target creature gets +1/+1 and gains lifelink until end of turn.

S.N.E.A.K. Dispatcher

{2}{U}, {T}: Look at the top card of target player's library. If it has an Agents of S.N.E.A.K. watermark, you may reveal it and put it into your hand. Otherwise, put it on your choice of the top or bottom of its owner's library.