Guff Rewrites History

For each player, choose target nonenchantment, nonland permanent that player controls. Those permanents' owners shuffle them into their libraries. Each player who controlled one of those permanents exiles cards from the top of their library until they exile a nonland card, then puts the rest on the bottom of their library in a random order. Each player may cast the nonland card they exiled without paying its mana cost.

Seize the Day

Untap target creature. After this main phase, there is an additional combat phase followed by an additional main phase.
Flashback {2}{R} (You may cast this card from your graveyard for its flashback cost. Then exile it.)

Magewright's Stone

{1}, {T}: Untap target creature that has an activated ability with {T} in its cost.

Chandra's Ignition

Target creature you control deals damage equal to its power to each other creature and each opponent.

Sensei's Divining Top

{1}: Look at the top three cards of your library, then put them back in any order.
{T}: Draw a card, then put Sensei's Divining Top on top of its owner's library.

Ponder

Look at the top three cards of your library, then put them back in any order. You may shuffle.
Draw a card.

Vizier of Tumbling Sands

{T}: Untap another target permanent.
Cycling {1}{U} ({1}{U}, Discard this card: Draw a card.)
When you cycle Vizier of Tumbling Sands, untap target permanent.

Liquimetal Torque

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Target nonland permanent becomes an artifact in addition to its other types until end of turn.

Brainstorm

Draw three cards, then put two cards from your hand on top of your library in any order.

Team Pennant

Equipped creature gets +1/+1 and has vigilance and trample.
Equip creature token {1}
Equip {3}

Talisman of Creativity

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add {U} or {R}. Talisman of Creativity deals 1 damage to you.

Kelpie Guide

{T}: Untap another target permanent you control.
{T}: Tap target permanent. Activate only if you control eight or more lands.

Arcbond

Choose target creature. Whenever that creature is dealt damage this turn, it deals that much damage to each other creature and each player.

Fiery Emancipation

If a source you control would deal damage to a permanent or player, it deals triple that damage to that permanent or player instead.

Arcane Signet

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Haunted Cloak

Equipped creature has vigilance, trample, and haste.
Equip {1} ({1}: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.)

Island

Mithril Coat

Flash
Indestructible
When Mithril Coat enters, attach it to target legendary creature you control.
Equipped creature has indestructible.
Equip {3}

Pemmin's Aura

Enchant creature
{U}: Untap enchanted creature.
{U}: Enchanted creature gains flying until end of turn.
{U}: Enchanted creature gains shroud until end of turn. (It can't be the target of spells or abilities.)
{1}: Enchanted creature gets +1/-1 or -1/+1 until end of turn.

Zoyowa's Justice

The owner of target artifact or creature with mana value 1 or greater shuffles it into their library. Then that player discovers X, where X is its mana value. (They exile cards from the top of their library until they exile a nonland card with that mana value or less. They cast it without paying its mana cost or put it into their hand. They put the rest on the bottom in a random order.)

Scroll Rack

{1}, {T}: Exile any number of cards from your hand face down. Put that many cards from the top of your library into your hand. Then look at the exiled cards and put them on top of your library in any order.

Break Through the Line

{R}: Target creature with power 2 or less gains haste until end of turn and can't be blocked this turn.

Alexander Clamilton

Whenever you cast a wordy spell, scry 2. (A spell is wordy if it has four or more lines of rules text.)
{1}{R}, {T}: Choose target creature you don't control. Reveal the top card of your library. Alexander Clamilton gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is the number of lines of rules text of the revealed card. Alexander Clamilton fights that creature.

Serum Visions

Darksteel Pendant

Indestructible (Effects that say "destroy" don't destroy this artifact.)
{1}, {T}: Scry 1. (Look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom.)

Everflowing Chalice

Multikicker {2} (You may pay an additional {2} any number of times as you cast this spell.)
Everflowing Chalice enters with a charge counter on it for each time it was kicked.
{T}: Add {C} for each charge counter on Everflowing Chalice.

Aether Tunnel

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +1/+0 and can't be blocked.

Strix Serenade

Counter target artifact, creature, or planeswalker spell. Its controller creates a 2/2 blue Bird creature token with flying.

Powerbalance

Whenever an opponent casts a spell, you may reveal the top card of your library. If you do, you may cast that card without paying its mana cost if the two spells have the same mana value.

Eternal Warrior

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has vigilance.

Key to the City

{T}, Discard a card: Up to one target creature can't be blocked this turn.
Whenever Key to the City becomes untapped, you may pay {2}. If you do, draw a card.

Mystical Tutor

Search your library for an instant or sorcery card, reveal it, then shuffle and put that card on top.

Arcane Denial

Counter target spell. Its controller may draw up to two cards at the beginning of the next turn's upkeep.
You draw a card at the beginning of the next turn's upkeep.

Memory Lapse

Counter target spell. If that spell is countered this way, put it on top of its owner's library instead of into that player's graveyard.

City on Fire

Convoke (Your creatures can help cast this spell. Each creature you tap while casting this spell pays for {1} or one mana of that creature's color.)
If a source you control would deal damage to a permanent or player, it deals triple that damage instead.

Sol Ring

The Reality Chip

You may look at the top card of your library any time.
As long as The Reality Chip is attached to a creature, you may play lands and cast spells from the top of your library.
Reconfigure {2}{U} ({2}{U}: Attach to target creature you control; or unattach from a creature. Reconfigure only as a sorcery. While attached, this isn't a creature.)

Blessed Reincarnation

Exile target creature an opponent controls. That player reveals cards from the top of their library until a creature card is revealed. The player puts that card onto the battlefield, then shuffles the rest into their library.
Rebound (If you cast this spell from your hand, exile it as it resolves. At the beginning of your next upkeep, you may cast this card from exile without paying its mana cost.)

Snapcaster Mage

Flash
When Snapcaster Mage enters, target instant or sorcery card in your graveyard gains flashback until end of turn. The flashback cost is equal to its mana cost. (You may cast that card from your graveyard for its flashback cost. Then exile it.)

Abrade

Choose one —
• Abrade deals 3 damage to target creature.
• Destroy target artifact.

Darksteel Plate

Indestructible
Equipped creature has indestructible.
Equip {2}

Fling

As an additional cost to cast this spell, sacrifice a creature.
Fling deals damage equal to the sacrificed creature's power to any target.

Izzet Signet

Aqueous Form

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature can't be blocked.
Whenever enchanted creature attacks, scry 1. (Look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom.)

Goblin Game

Each player hides at least one item, then all players reveal them simultaneously. Each player loses life equal to the number of items they revealed. The player who revealed the fewest items then loses half their life, rounded up. If two or more players are tied for fewest, each loses half their life, rounded up.

Mountain

Sword of Vengeance

Equipped creature gets +2/+0 and has first strike, vigilance, trample, and haste.
Equip {3}

Sting, the Glinting Dagger

Equipped creature gets +1/+1 and has haste.
At the beginning of each combat, untap equipped creature.
Equipped creature has first strike as long as it's blocking or blocked by a Goblin or Orc.
Equip {2}

Glittering Stockpile

{T}: Add {R}. Put a stash counter on Glittering Stockpile.
{T}, Sacrifice Glittering Stockpile: Add X mana of any one color, where X is the number of stash counters on Glittering Stockpile.

Swan Song

Counter target enchantment, instant, or sorcery spell. Its controller creates a 2/2 blue Bird creature token with flying.

Aphetto Alchemist

{T}: Untap target artifact or creature.
Morph {U} (You may cast this card face down as a 2/2 creature for {3}. Turn it face up any time for its morph cost.)

Kediss, Emberclaw Familiar

Whenever a commander you control deals combat damage to an opponent, it deals that much damage to each other opponent.
Partner (You can have two commanders if both have partner.)

Basilisk Collar

Equipped creature has deathtouch and lifelink.
Equip {2}

Ral Zarek

+1: Tap target permanent, then untap another target permanent.
−2: Ral Zarek deals 3 damage to any target.
−7: Flip five coins. Take an extra turn after this one for each coin that comes up heads.

Fellwar Stone

{T}: Add one mana of any color that a land an opponent controls could produce.

Nimbleclaw Adept

Bigby's Hand — {T}: Untap two other target permanents. Activate only as a sorcery and only once each turn.

Izzet Charm

Choose one —
• Counter target noncreature spell unless its controller pays {2}.
• Izzet Charm deals 2 damage to target creature.
• Draw two cards, then discard two cards.

Brash Taunter

Indestructible
Whenever Brash Taunter is dealt damage, it deals that much damage to target opponent.
{2}{R}, {T}: Brash Taunter fights another target creature.

Wheel of Misfortune

Each player secretly chooses a number 0 or greater, then all players reveal those numbers simultaneously and determine the highest and lowest numbers revealed this way. Wheel of Misfortune deals damage equal to the highest number to each player who chose that number. Each player who didn't choose the lowest number discards their hand, then draws seven cards.

Amphibian Downpour

Flash
Storm (When you cast this spell, copy it for each spell cast before it this turn. You may choose new targets for the copies. Copies become tokens.)
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature loses all abilities and is a blue Frog creature with base power and toughness 1/1.

Heartless Hidetsugu

{T}: Heartless Hidetsugu deals damage to each player equal to half that player's life total, rounded down.

Avacyn's Collar

Equipped creature gets +1/+0 and has vigilance.
Whenever equipped creature dies, if it was a Human, create a 1/1 white Spirit creature token with flying.
Equip {2}

Training Grounds

Activated abilities of creatures you control cost {2} less to activate. This effect can't reduce the mana in that cost to less than one mana.

Otherworldly Gaze

Surveil 3. (Look at the top three cards of your library, then put any number of them into your graveyard and the rest on top of your library in any order.)
Flashback {1}{U} (You may cast this card from your graveyard for its flashback cost. Then exile it.)

Chaos Warp

The owner of target permanent shuffles it into their library, then reveals the top card of their library. If it's a permanent card, they put it onto the battlefield.

Thousand-Year Elixir

You may activate abilities of creatures you control as though those creatures had haste.
{1}, {T}: Untap target creature.