Ghostly Prison

Creatures can't attack you unless their controller pays {2} for each creature they control that's attacking you.

Sanguine Bond

Whenever you gain life, target opponent loses that much life.

Bad Ass

Cauldron Familiar

When Cauldron Familiar enters, each opponent loses 1 life and you gain 1 life.
Sacrifice a Food: Return Cauldron Familiar from your graveyard to the battlefield.

Tempt with Discovery

Tempting offer — Search your library for a land card and put it onto the battlefield. Each opponent may search their library for a land card and put it onto the battlefield. For each opponent who searches a library this way, search your library for a land card and put it onto the battlefield. Then each player who searched a library this way shuffles.

The Great Henge

This spell costs {X} less to cast, where X is the greatest power among creatures you control.
{T}: Add {G}{G}. You gain 2 life.
Whenever a nontoken creature you control enters, put a +1/+1 counter on it and draw a card.

Cultivate

Search your library for up to two basic land cards, reveal those cards, put one onto the battlefield tapped and the other into your hand, then shuffle.

The Gaffer

At the beginning of each end step, if you gained 3 or more life this turn, draw a card.

Creature Guy

Gotcha — If an opponent says "creature" or "guy," you may say "Gotcha!" When you do, return Creature Guy from your graveyard to your hand.

Ancient Tomb

{T}: Add {C}{C}. Ancient Tomb deals 2 damage to you.

City of Ass

City of Ass enters tapped.
{T}: Add one and one-half mana of any one color.

Gleemax

You choose all targets for all spells and abilities.

Three Visits

Search your library for a Forest card, put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle.

Fabled Passage

{T}, Sacrifice Fabled Passage: Search your library for a basic land card, put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle. Then if you control four or more lands, untap that land.

Cheap Ass

Granny's Payback

Kambal, Consul of Allocation

Whenever an opponent casts a noncreature spell, that player loses 2 life and you gain 2 life.

Mother of Goons

Whenever a creature an opponent controls dies, sacrifice Mother of Goons unless you insult that creature.

B-I-N-G-O

Trample
Whenever a player casts a spell, put a chip counter on its mana value.
B-I-N-G-O gets +9/+9 for each set of three numbers in a row with chip counters on them.

Serra Ascendant

Lifelink (Damage dealt by this creature also causes you to gain that much life.)
As long as you have 30 or more life, Serra Ascendant gets +5/+5 and has flying.

Laughing Hyena

Gotcha — If an opponent laughs, you may say "Gotcha!" When you do, return Laughing Hyena from your graveyard to your hand.

Smothering Tithe

Whenever an opponent draws a card, that player may pay {2}. If the player doesn't, you create a Treasure token. (It's an artifact with "{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.")

Archangel of Thune

Flying
Lifelink (Damage dealt by this creature also causes you to gain that much life.)
Whenever you gain life, put a +1/+1 counter on each creature you control.

Essence Warden

Whenever another creature enters, you gain 1 life.

Urborg, Tomb of Yawgmoth

Each land is a Swamp in addition to its other land types.

Blossoming Sands

This land enters tapped.
When this land enters, you gain 1 life.
{T}: Add {G} or {W}.

Bountiful Promenade

Bountiful Promenade enters tapped unless you have two or more opponents.
{T}: Add {G} or {W}.

The One Ring

Indestructible
When The One Ring enters, if you cast it, you gain protection from everything until your next turn.
At the beginning of your upkeep, you lose 1 life for each burden counter on The One Ring.
{T}: Put a burden counter on The One Ring, then draw a card for each burden counter on The One Ring.

Windswept Heath

{T}, Pay 1 life, Sacrifice Windswept Heath: Search your library for a Forest or Plains card, put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle.

Swamp

Exquisite Blood

Whenever an opponent loses life, you gain that much life.

Beast Whisperer

Whenever you cast a creature spell, draw a card.

Godless Shrine

({T}: Add {W} or {B}.)
As Godless Shrine enters, you may pay 2 life. If you don't, it enters tapped.

Authority of the Consuls

Creatures your opponents control enter tapped.
Whenever a creature an opponent controls enters, you gain 1 life.

Thalia and The Gitrog Monster

First strike, deathtouch
You may play an additional land on each of your turns.
Creatures and nonbasic lands your opponents control enter tapped.
Whenever Thalia and The Gitrog Monster attacks, sacrifice a creature or land, then draw a card.

Plains

Beacon of Immortality

Double target player's life total. Shuffle Beacon of Immortality into its owner's library.

Grim Monolith

Grim Monolith doesn't untap during your untap step.
{T}: Add {C}{C}{C}.
{4}: Untap Grim Monolith.

Scrubland

Marsh Flats

{T}, Pay 1 life, Sacrifice Marsh Flats: Search your library for a Plains or Swamp card, put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle.

Pristine Talisman

Swords to Plowshares

Exile target creature. Its controller gains life equal to its power.

Reprieve

Return target spell to its owner's hand.
Draw a card.

Isochron Scepter

Imprint — When Isochron Scepter enters, you may exile an instant card with mana value 2 or less from your hand.
{2}, {T}: You may copy the exiled card. If you do, you may cast the copy without paying its mana cost.

Sol Ring

Bilbo, Birthday Celebrant

If you would gain life, you gain that much life plus 1 instead.
{2}{W}{B}{G}, {T}, Exile Bilbo, Birthday Celebrant: Search your library for any number of creature cards, put them onto the battlefield, then shuffle. Activate only if you have 111 or more life.

Ocelot Pride

First strike, lifelink
Ascend (If you control ten or more permanents, you get the city's blessing for the rest of the game.)
At the beginning of your end step, if you gained life this turn, create a 1/1 white Cat creature token. Then if you have the city's blessing, for each token you control that entered this turn, create a token that's a copy of it.

Esper Sentinel

Whenever an opponent casts their first noncreature spell each turn, draw a card unless that player pays {X}, where X is Esper Sentinel's power.

Astarion, the Decadent

Deathtouch, lifelink
At the beginning of your end step, choose one —
• Feed — Target opponent loses life equal to the amount of life they lost this turn.
• Friends — You gain life equal to the amount of life you gained this turn.

Bayou

Avacyn's Pilgrim

Mox Lotus

{T}: Add {∞}.
{100}: Add one mana of any color.

Temple Garden

({T}: Add {G} or {W}.)
As Temple Garden enters, you may pay 2 life. If you don't, it enters tapped.

Forsaken Monument

Colorless creatures you control get +2/+2.
Whenever you tap a permanent for {C}, add an additional {C}.
Whenever you cast a colorless spell, you gain 2 life.

Academy Manufactor

If you would create a Clue, Food, or Treasure token, instead create one of each.

Scoured Barrens

This land enters tapped.
When this land enters, you gain 1 life.
{T}: Add {W} or {B}.

Llanowar Elves

Tireless Provisioner

Landfall — Whenever a land you control enters, create a Food token or a Treasure token. (Food is an artifact with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life." Treasure is an artifact with "{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.")

Letter Bomb

When Letter Bomb enters, sign it and shuffle it into target player's library. That player reveals each card they draw until they draw Letter Bomb. When that player draws Letter Bomb, it deals 19½ damage to them.

Growth Spurt

Roll a six-sided die. Target creature gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the result.

AWOL

Exile target attacking creature. Then remove it from the game. Then put it into the absolutely-removed-from-the-freaking-game-forever zone.

Necrotic Ooze

As long as Necrotic Ooze is on the battlefield, it has all activated abilities of all creature cards in all graveyards.

Forest

Undergrowth Stadium

Undergrowth Stadium enters tapped unless you have two or more opponents.
{T}: Add {B} or {G}.

Soul's Attendant

Whenever another creature enters, you may gain 1 life.

Sphere of Safety

Creatures can't attack you or planeswalkers you control unless their controller pays {X} for each of those creatures, where X is the number of enchantments you control.

The Meathook Massacre

When The Meathook Massacre enters, each creature gets -X/-X until end of turn.
Whenever a creature you control dies, each opponent loses 1 life.
Whenever a creature an opponent controls dies, you gain 1 life.

Birds of Paradise

Terramorphic Expanse

{T}, Sacrifice Terramorphic Expanse: Search your library for a basic land card, put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.

Land Aid '04

Search your library for a basic land card, put that card onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle. If you sang a song the whole time you were searching and shuffling, you may untap that land.

Fellwar Stone

{T}: Add one mana of any color that a land an opponent controls could produce.

Animate Graveyard

Enchant your graveyard
Enchanted graveyard is a creature on the battlefield with base power and toughness each equal to the number of cards in it. It has the text boxes of all creature cards in it. It's still a graveyard.
If enchanted graveyard would leave the battlefield, instead exile Animate Graveyard.

Jungle Hollow

This land enters tapped.
When this land enters, you gain 1 life.
{T}: Add {B} or {G}.

Witch's Oven

{T}, Sacrifice a creature: Create a Food token. If the sacrificed creature's toughness was 4 or greater, create two Food tokens instead. (They're artifacts with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.")

Alhammarret's Archive

If you would gain life, you gain twice that much life instead.
If you would draw a card except the first one you draw in each of your draw steps, draw two cards instead.

Overgrown Tomb

({T}: Add {B} or {G}.)
As Overgrown Tomb enters, you may pay 2 life. If you don't, it enters tapped.

Yavimaya, Cradle of Growth

Each land is a Forest in addition to its other land types.

Chromatic Lantern

Lands you control have "{T}: Add one mana of any color."
{T}: Add one mana of any color.

Shattered Angel

Flying
Whenever a land an opponent controls enters, you may gain 3 life.

Eye to Eye

You and target creature's controller have a staring contest. If you win, destroy that creature.

Savannah

Radiant Fountain

When Radiant Fountain enters, you gain 2 life.
{T}: Add {C}.

Reanimate

Put target creature card from a graveyard onto the battlefield under your control. You lose life equal to its mana value.

Soul Warden

Vault of Champions

Vault of Champions enters tapped unless you have two or more opponents.
{T}: Add {W} or {B}.

Indatha Triome

({T}: Add {W}, {B}, or {G}.)
Indatha Triome enters tapped.
Cycling {3} ({3}, Discard this card: Draw a card.)

Rhox Faithmender

Lifelink (Damage dealt by this creature also causes you to gain that much life.)
If you would gain life, you gain twice that much life instead.

Verdant Catacombs

{T}, Pay 1 life, Sacrifice Verdant Catacombs: Search your library for a Swamp or Forest card, put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle.

Rogue's Passage

{T}: Add {C}.
{4}, {T}: Target creature can't be blocked this turn.

Chancellor of the Annex

You may reveal this card from your opening hand. If you do, when each opponent casts their first spell of the game, counter that spell unless that player pays {1}.
Flying
Whenever an opponent casts a spell, counter it unless that player pays {1}.

Reliquary Tower

You have no maximum hand size.
{T}: Add {C}.

Enlightened Tutor

Search your library for an artifact or enchantment card, reveal it, then shuffle and put that card on top.