Gorilla Tactics

Create a 2/2 green Gorilla creature token.
When a spell or ability an opponent controls causes you to discard Gorilla Tactics, create two 2/2 green Gorilla creature tokens.

Liliana's Undead Minion

You can't lose the game.
+1: Each opponent loses 1 life.
−4: Destroy target creature.

Liliana's Other Contract

When Liliana's Other Contract enters the battlefield, you draw three cards and you lose 3 life.
If you would lose the game, instead exile Liliana's Other Contract, then return it to the battlefield transformed under your control.

Liliana's Other Contract // Liliana's Undead Minion

Anax and Cymede & Kynaios and Tiro

First strike, vigilance
Heroic — Whenever you cast a spell that targets Anax and Cymede & Kynaios and Tiro, draw a card. Each player may put a land card from their hand onto the battlefield, then each opponent who didn't draws a card.

Xyru Specter

Flying
Whenever Xyru Specter deals damage to an opponent, that player discards a card unless they challenge you. If challenged, and you show them two black cards in your hand, they must discard two cards.

Indicate

Fludge, Gunk Guardian

Whenever Fludge, Gunk Guardian or another Slug, Ooze, Fungus, or Mutant enters the battlefield under your control, each opponent shuffles three Gunk cards into their library. (Gunk is a colorless sorcery card with no mana cost that has cycling {4}.)

Seek Bolas's Counsel

Choose one at random —
• You get an emblem with "At the beginning of your upkeep, pay {U}{B}{R}. If you don't, you lose the game."
• Each player discards their hand.
• Planeswalk to Pools of Becoming. (Once there, you can roll the planar die only if you're playing Planechase.)
• For each opponent, exile cards from the top of their library until you exile a nonland card. You may cast those cards without paying their mana costs.
• Destroy all creatures and non-Bolas planeswalkers.
• You get an emblem with "You can cast nonland cards from your sideboard."

Cleaver Blow

Multicleave {1} (You may pay an additional {1} any number of times as you cast this spell. For each time you do, choose a paired set of square brackets and remove the words in between.)
 Destroy target [nonblack] creature [with mana value 3 or less] [an opponent controls]. You [and its controller each] draw a card [and lose 2 life]. Create a [tapped] 1/1 white Spirit creature token with flying.

Alberix, the Trade Planet

Planet (When this permanent enters, exile the top five cards of your library as its resources.)
Trade Routes — At the beginning of your precombat main phase, choose one —
• Discard a card. If you do, put two of Alberix's resources into its owner's hand.
• Exile the top card of your library as a resource.

Jeskai Baller

When you cast this spell, create a 1/1 white Athlete creature token.
Rebound (If you cast this spell from your hand, exile it as it resolves. At the beginning of your next upkeep, you may cast this card from exile without paying its mana cost.)

Baneslayer Aspirant

Baneslayer Aspirant gets +3/+3 and has flying, first strike, and lifelink as long as you have one or more emblems.

Innocuous Insect

Buyback {1}{U} (You may pay an additional {1}{U} as you cast this spell. If you do, put this card into your hand as it resolves.)
Flash
Flying
When you cast this spell, draw a card.

Rule with an Even Hand

(Start the game with this conspiracy face up in the command zone.)
You can't attack with an odd number of creatures.
Whenever you attack, double target creature's power until end of turn.

Lazotep Archway

Lazotep Archway enters the battlefield tapped.
{T}: Add {W} or {B}.
Eternalize {3}{W}{B} ({3}{W}{B}: Exile this card from your graveyard: Create a token that's a copy of it, except it's a 4/4 black Zombie creature and loses all other card types. Eternalize only as a sorcery. And don't forget it still enters tapped!)

Oddric, Lunar Marquis

At the beginning of each combat, creatures you control gain banding until end of turn if a creature you control has banding. The same is true for changeling, devoid, fear, flanking, horsemanship, ingest, intimidate, landwalk, shroud, tantrum, wither, and the activated ability "Sacrifice this creature: Add {C}."

Underdark Beholder

Underdark Beholder enters the battlefield with ten eyestalk counters on it.
If Underdark Beholder would be dealt damage, remove that many eyestalk counters from it instead. If you can't, sacrifice it.
Whenever Underdark Beholder attacks, reveal cards from the top of your library until you reveal an instant, sorcery, or enchantment card with converted mana cost less than the number of eyestalk counters on Underdark Beholder. You may cast it without paying its mana cost. Shuffle your library.

Learned Learner

As long as you have a maximum hand size other than 7, Learned Learner has "{T}: Draw a card."

Omnipresent Impostor

Changeling
Omnipresent Impostor has all card names.
As you search your library for one or more cards, you may choose Omnipresent Impostor as one of those cards. (For example, if you search for two land cards, you may find Omnipresent Impostor and a land card.)

Boulder Jockey

({D} is a land drop. You may give up one potential land drop this turn to pay for {D}.)
Whenever Boulder Jockey attacks, you may pay {D}. If you do, create a 3/3 colorless Construct artifact creature token named Boulder that's tapped and attacking. Sacrifice that token at the beginning of the next end step.

Witty Demon

Flying
When Witty Demon enters, if your starting library had at least 13 cards over the minimum, search your library for a card and put that card into your hand, then shuffle your library. Otherwise, Witty Demon deals 4 damage to you.

Planequake

Planequake deals X damage to each creature without flying and each planeswalker. If X is 10 or more, open the "Uncovered Cavern" plot booster.

Loopy Lobster

Four-faced (Whenever this becomes tapped, move it to the next stage, or to stage 1 if it's at stage 4.)
Stage 1 — (1/4)
Stage 2 — (4/1) Evolve
Stage 3 — (2/4) {U}: Loopy Lobster gets +1/-1 until end of turn.
Stage 4 — (4/4) Vigilance. {T}: Draw 2 cards.

Hish of the Snake Cult

Nagas and Serpents you control are Snakes. (We'll errata this to be true.)
Snakes you control have daunt, deathtouch, and poisonous 2. (A creature with daunt can't be blocked by creatures with power 2 or less. Whenever a creature with poisonous 2 deals combat damage to a player, that player gets two poison counters.)

Toddler's Rage

Flash
Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +2/+1 and has tantrum. (It's like trample but for blocking.)

Blood Poet

Spark (Activate spark abilities by spending or giving yourself spark counters. Activate only one spark ability per turn, and only as a sorcery.)
+1: Blood Poet gains lifelink until end of turn.
−3: Target opponent discards a card. You gain life equal to its converted mana cost.

Dwarven Confluencer

{T}: Destroy target nontoken land. Its controller creates a Mana Confluence token. (It's a land with "{T}, Pay 1 life: Add one mana of any color.")

Squidnapper

When Squidnapper enters, gain control of target creature an opponent controls until Squidnapper leaves the battlefield or that player pays the ransom.
Ransom — {6} and 2 life

Marchesa's Surprise Party

(Start the game with this conspiracy face up in the command zone. Before the game, secretly choose one of the following. During your end step, if you meet the condition, you may reveal your choice and turn this card face down. When you do, collect the reward.)
• You've cast three or more spells this turn.
• An opponent lost 6 or more life this turn.
• There are nine or more cards in your graveyard.
Reward — Draw a card.

Wrath of Leknif

Destroy all creatures. They can't be regenerated. Untap up to four lands you control.

Don't Worry About It

Enchant card in your hand (This Aura remains on the battlefield. If you play enchanted card or it otherwise leaves your hand, put this Aura into the graveyard.)
Enchanted card costs {1} less to cast.
When you cast enchanted card, copy it.

Naturalize 2

Destroy target artifact, enchantment, emblem, or gameplay tracker. (Trackers include play aids such as dungeons, city's blessing, and monarch. When you destroy it, the associated object or designation is removed from the game.)

Destroy target creature. Its controller creates two 1/2 red Half creature tokens.

Smelt

Smelt // Herd // Saw

Stack of Paperwork

When Stack of Paperwork enters, draw a card.
Combat damage uses the stack. (Combat damage assignment can be responded to before damage is dealt.)

Meandered Towershell

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has islandwalk and "Whenever this creature attacks, exile it and Meandered Towershell. Return it to the battlefield under your control tapped and attacking at the beginning of the declare attackers step on your next turn, then return Meandered Towershell to the battlefield under its owner's control attached to that creature."

Wowzer, the Aspirational

Whenever Wowzer, the Aspirational attacks, if you have an {E}, control a Blood, a Clue, a Food, a Map, a Powerstone, and a Treasure, are the monarch, and have the city's blessing and the initiative, you win the game.

Frogkin Kidnapper

When Frogkin Kidnapper enters, target opponent reveals their hand. Choose a nonland card from it. Ransom that card. (Exile it. Its owner may pay {3} at any time to return it to their hand.)

TL;DR

Exile target creature if it has any abilities other than keywords. (Flying, protection, and partner are all keywords. See rule 702 for details. Landfall and scry aren't keywords; they're an ability word and a keyword action respectively. Yes, there's a difference.)

Wormhole Warp

Exile target creature an opponent controls. That player reveals cards from their sideboard at random until they reveal a nonland card. They may cast that card without paying its mana cost.

Questing Cosplayer

When Questing Cosplayer enters the battlefield, create a Questing Role token and attach it to target creature. (If you control another Role on it, put that one into the graveyard. Enchanted creature has all the abilities of Questing Beast.)

Animate Spell

Flash
Enchant instant or sorcery spell on the stack
When Animate Spell becomes attached to an instant or sorcery, put that card onto the battlefield under its owner's control. It's a creature in addition to its other types with power and toughness each equal to its converted mana cost.
When Animate Spell leaves the battlefield, enchanted card's owner sacrifices it unless they cast it.

Omenpath to Naya

Vanishing 4 (This land enters the battlefield with four time counters on it. At the beginning of your upkeep, remove a time counter from it. When the last is removed, sacrifice it.)
{T}: Add {R}, {G}, or {W}.

Garth One-Eye

{T}: Choose a card name that hasn't been chosen from among Disenchant, Braingeyser, Terror, Shivan Dragon, Regrowth, and Black Lotus. Create a copy of the card with the chosen name. You may cast the copy. (You still pay its costs.)

Microscope

{T}: Surveil 1.
{T}: Target permanent card in a graveyard becomes a 0/0 black Germ creature in addition to its other colors and types until end of turn. (This effect ends if it leaves the graveyard.)

Glimpse, the Unthinkable

Shroud (This creature can't be the target of spells or abilities.)
Glimpse, the Unthinkable can't be chosen.
The name Glimpse, the Unthinkable can't be chosen.

Who's That Praetor?

Choose one at random. Create a token that's a copy of the chosen card.
• Elesh Norn, Mother of Machines
• Jin-Gitaxias, Progress Tyrant
• Sheoldred, the Apocalypse
• Urabrask, Heretic Praetor
• Vorinclex, Monstrous Raider
• Ebon Praetor

Night of the Flying Merfolk

Bedtime story (Don't put a lore counter on this Saga as it enters. Put a lore counter on it at the beginning of your end step rather than your main phase. Sacrifice after III.)
I - Create two 1/1 blue Merfolk creature tokens.
II - Put a flying counter on each tapped creature you control.
III - Draw a card for each creature you control that dealt combat damage to a player this turn.

The Heron Moon

{T}: Add {C}.
{1}, {T}: Exile the bottom card of target opponent's library.
Whenever one or more cards an opponent owns are put into exile, put a release counter on The Heron Moon. Then if it has thirteen or more release counters on it, sacrifice it and create a copy of Emrakul, the Promised End. Cast it without paying its mana cost.

Generated Horizons

At the beginning of your upkeep, create a Forest land token.

Fire

Fire deals 2 damage divided as you choose among one or two targets.

Start

Create two 1/1 white Warrior creature tokens with vigilance.

Start // Fire

Five Kids in a Trenchcoat

Five Kids in a Trenchcoat counts as five creatures for spells and effects that count the number of creatures you control.

Wrenn and One

+1: Wrenn and One gains "{T}: Add {G} until your next turn.
−1: Create a 1/1 green Squirrel creature token.
−4: You get an emblem with "At the beginning of your precombat main phase, add {G} for each creature you control."

Taiga Stadium

Taiga Stadium enters tapped unless you control a white, blue, or black permanent.
{T}: Add {R} or {G}.

New Master of Arms

First strike
Prevent all combat damage that would be dealt by blocking creatures that are tapped.
{1}{W}: Tap target creature blocking New Master of Arms.

Banding Sliver

All Slivers have banding. (Any creatures with banding, and up to one without, can attack in a band. Bands are blocked as a group. If any creatures with banding you control are blocking or being blocked by a creature, you divide that creature's combat damage, not its controller, among any of the creatures it's being blocked by or is blocking.)

Control Win Condition

This spell can't be countered.
Shroud
Control Win Condition's power and toughness are each equal to the number of turns you've taken this game. (If this is in your deck, please keep track of your turns. This means you, Mark.)

Snap Judgment

The player who wins this game also wins the match. (A player may concede the game at any time. If the game ends while this spell is on the stack, it never resolves.)
Cycling {1}

Pithing Spyglass

As Pithing Spyglass enters, name a keyword ability or ability word.
All cards in all zones lose that keyword ability or ability word and all text tied to that ability.

A Good Thing

Spells and abilities you control can't destroy, exile, target, or cause you to sacrifice A Good Thing.
At the beginning of your upkeep, double your life total. Then, if you have 1,000 or more life, you lose the game.

Mox Poison

{T}: Add one mana of any color. You get two poison counters.

Siege Elemental

Trample
Untapped creatures can't block.
Tapped creatures can block.

Zyym, Mesmeric Lord

Flying, deathtouch
When Zyym, Mesmeric Lord enters the battlefield, target opponent chooses an order for the cards in their hand, then reveals them one by one until you say stop. That player then discards the most recently revealed card.

Panglacial Shinobi

Library ninjutsu {1}{U} ({1}{U}, Shuffle an unblocked attacker you control into its owner's library: Put this card onto the battlefield from your library tapped and attacking. Activate only while searching your library.)
Whenever Panglacial Shinobi deals combat damage to a player, draw a card.

Maestros' Totally Safe Hideout

Land casualty 2 (As this land enters, you may sacrifice a creature with power 2 or greater. If you do, create a token that's a copy of this land.)
Maestros' Totally Safe Hideout enters the battlefield tapped.
{T}: Add {U}, {B}, or {R}.

Tax Taker

Whenever an opponent pays a tax from a spell or permanent you control, create a number of Treasure tokens equal to the amount of mana they paid. (This happens each time a spell you control or an ability of a permanent you control causes an opponent to pay extra mana. Cards that can tax opponents include Mana Tithe, Esper Sentinel, and Ghostly Prison.)

Waste Land

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}, Sacrifice Waste Land: Destroy target nonbasic land. That land's controller creates a Wastes token. (It's a land with {T}: Add {C}.)

Graveyard Dig

Return up to two target [black or green] creature cards from your graveyard to your hand.
You may cast this spell for {2}{B/G}{B/G}. If you do, ignore the bracketed text.

Scaled Destruction

Choose one or more —
• Destroy all small creatures.
• Destroy all medium creatures.
• Destroy all large creatures.
(A small creature has total power and toughness 4 or less, medium is 5—8, and large is 9 or more.)

Growth Charm

Choose one —
• Rampant Growth
• Giant Growth
• Regrowth

Form of the Mulldrifter

When Form of the Mulldrifter enters, draw two cards.
You may cast creature cards from your hand as though they were the card Mulldrifter. (You can still evoke this way. They're Mulldrifters.)

Noxious Bayou

{T}: Add {B} or {G}. You get a poison counter.

Inspirational Antelope

Legacy — Before the game starts, choose a keyword or ability word and write it below.
Spells with __________ you cast cost {1} less to cast.

Truth or Dare

Target opponent chooses one —
• Truth — That player plays with their hand revealed for the rest of the game.
• Dare — Mill all but the bottom ten cards of that player's library. (To mill, put the top card of that library into its owner's graveyard.)

Starting Town NPC

Each creature card in your hand has a {1}{G} Adventure sorcery named Fetch Herbs with "You gain 2 life." (You may cast it as the Adventure for {1}{G}. Then exile it, and you may cast the creature later from exile.)
Each creature card you cast from exile enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it.

Mirrored Lotus

Reflect {0} (As this enters, each opponent may pay {0}. When they do, they create a token copy of this except it lacks this ability.)
{T}, Exile Mirrored Lotus: Add three mana of any one color.

Narod, the Beige Flower

Each creature assigns combat damage equal to its mana value rather than its power.

Sliv-Mizzet, Hivemind

Slivers you control have flying and "Whenever you draw a card, this creature deals 1 damage to any target" and "{T}: Draw a card."

Vuzzle Spaceship

Spaceship 6 (This creature enters with six +1/+1 counters. If it would be dealt damage, remove that many +1/+1 counters instead. Its abilities are active as long as it has at least that many +1/+1 counters.)
Thrusters [6] → Flying
Lasers [3] → Whenever Vuzzle Spaceship attacks, it deals 1 damage to any target.

Kozilek, Compleated

({C/P} can be paid with either {C} or 2 life.)
When you cast this spell, each opponent gets two poison counters, then each opponent with more than two cards in hand discards cards equal to the difference.
Annihinfect (Whenever this creature attacks, defending player sacrifices a permanent for each poison counter they have.)

Lightning Colt

When Lightning Colt enters, it deals 3 damage to any target.

Chatzuk, Mighty Guitarist

Banding (Just ask around until you find someone who knows.)
Creature spells you cast with banding cost {2} less to cast.
Whenever two or more creatures you control attack in a band, each creature in that band gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each creature in that band.

Magus of the Chains

If a player would draw a card except the first one they draw in each of their draw steps, that player discards a card instead. If the player discards a card this way, they draw a card. If the player doesn't discard a card this way, they mill a card.

Take a Trip to...

Draw two cards. This spell deals 2 damage to each opponent. (Then exile this card. You may play the land later from exile.)

Value Town

Value Town enters the battlefield tapped.
{T}: Add {U} or {R}.

Value Town // Take a Trip to...

Their

Target opponent gains control of target creature you control.

There

Exile target creature you control, then return it to the battlefield under its owner's control.

There // They're // Their

Gobland

(Gobland isn't a spell, it's affected by summoning sickness, and it has "{T}: Add {R}.")
Gobland can't block.

Soulmates

Enchant two creatures
Enchanted creatures each get +1/+1 and have hexproof.
When one of the enchanted creatures dies, destroy the other.

Intangible Vibes

All creatures are tokens. (They're considered tokens for spells and abilities. After a creature leaves the battlefield, it ceases to exist.)

Plain Walker

Plainswalk
Planeswalkerwalk (This creature can't be blocked as long as defending player controls a planeswalker.)
Whenever Plain Walker deals combat damage to a player or planeswalker, planeswalk. (If you're playing Planechase, proceed to the next plane.)

Terry Pin, Turboturtle

Flash
Haste
You may ignore the words "Activate only as a sorcery" while activating abilities.

How to Keep an Izzet Mage Busy

Return How to Keep an Izzet Mage Busy to its owner's hand.

Interplanar Brushwagg

Interplanar (This creature enters onto the interplanar battlefield. Players can't control creatures on the interplanar battlefield.)
Vigilance, haste
Whenever a player attacks with a creature with power 4 or greater, Interplanar Brushwagg also attacks the player or planeswalker that creature is attacking.

One with Death

Enroll in the Coalition

You are a Flagbearer.
While choosing targets as part of casting a spell or activating an ability, your opponents must choose at least one Flagbearer if able.

Common Black Removal

Choose one. Destroy target creature, then —
• Create a Food token.
• Create a Treasure token.
• Put a menace counter on a creature you control.
• That creature's controller mills cards equal to its power.

You Compleat Me

If your life total is greater than 10, it becomes 10. For the rest of the game, your maximum life total is 10. You get an emblem with "Pay 2 life: Add one mana of any color" and "At the beginning of your upkeep, you draw a card and you lose 1 life."

Lutri, Pauper Otter

Companion — Your starting deck contains no cards with a silver, gold, orange, or purple expansion symbol. (If this card is your chosen companion, you may put it into your hand from outside the game for {3} as a sorcery.)
When Lutri, Pauper Otter enters the battlefield, discard your hand, then draw three cards.