Dr. Julius Jumblemorph

Dr. Julius Jumblemorph is every creature type (even if this card isn't on the battlefield).
Whenever a host you control enters, you may search your library and/or graveyard for a card with augment and combine it with that host. If you search your library this way, shuffle.

Wordmail

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 for each word in its name.

Our Market Research Shows That Players Like Really Long Card Names So We Made this Card to Have the Absolute Longest Card Name Ever Elemental

Art rampage 2 (Whenever this creature becomes blocked by a creature, it gets +2/+2 for each creature in the blocker's art beyond the first.)

Oddly Uneven

Choose one —
• Destroy each creature with an odd number of words in its name. (Hyphenated words are one word.)
• Destroy each creature with an even number of words in its name.

GO TO JAIL

When GO TO JAIL enters, exile target creature an opponent controls until GO TO JAIL leaves the battlefield.
At the beginning of the upkeep of the exiled card's owner, that player rolls two six-sided dice. If they roll doubles, sacrifice GO TO JAIL.

Teacher's Pet

{2}{W}, Sacrifice Teacher's Pet: Search your library for a card with augment, combine it with target host you control, then shuffle.

Shaggy Camel

When this creature enters, creatures you control get +1/+1 until end of turn.

Adorable Kitten

When this creature enters, roll a six-sided die. You gain life equal to the result.

Flavor Judge

{T}: Choose target spell or ability that targets a permanent you control. Then ask a person outside the game if the story of what will happen makes sense. If they say no, sacrifice Flavor Judge and counter that spell or ability.

Ordinary Pony

When this creature enters, you may exile target non-Horse creature you control that wasn't put onto the battlefield with this ability this turn, then return it to the battlefield under its owner's control.

Humming-

Flying
Whenever you attack with two or more creatures,
Augment {3}{W} ({3}{W}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Success!

Target creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn. If it's a host or has augment, it gains lifelink until end of turn.

AWOL

Exile target attacking creature. Then remove it from the game. Then put it into the absolutely-removed-from-the-freaking-game-forever zone.

Half-Kitten, Half-

Whenever you're dealt damage,
Augment {2}{W} ({2}{W}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Rhino-

Whenever this creature blocks,
Augment {3}{W} ({3}{W}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Strutting Turkey

When this creature enters,
exile target creature card with mana value 2 or less from your graveyard. If it has augment, combine it with a host you control. Otherwise, put it onto the battlefield.

Look at Me, I'm R&D

As Look at Me, I'm R&D comes into play, choose a number and a second number one higher or one lower than that number.
All instances of the first chosen number on permanents, spells, and cards in any zone are the second chosen number.

Look at Me, I'm the DCI

Ban a card other than a basic land card for the rest of the match. (All cards with that name in any zone or sideboard are removed from the match.)

Bosom Buddy

Whenever you cast a spell, you may gain ½ life for each word in that spell's name.

Emcee

Whenever another creature enters, you may stand up and say in a deep, booming voice, "Presenting . . . " and that creature's name. If you do, put a +1/+1 counter on that creature.

Underdome

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add one mana of any color. Spend this mana only to pay Un-costs.

B-I-N-G-O

Trample
Whenever a player casts a spell, put a chip counter on its mana value.
B-I-N-G-O gets +9/+9 for each set of three numbers in a row with chip counters on them.

Spirit of the Season

When Spirit of the Season enters, it gains haste if it's summer. Put a +1/+1 counter on it if it's autumn. You gain 5 life if it's winter. If it's spring, search your library for a basic land card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Symbol Status

Create a 1/1 colorless Expansion-Symbol creature token for each different expansion symbol among permanents you control.

Serpentine

Landfall — Whenever a land you control enters,
Augment {2}{G} ({2}{G}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Monkey-

Whenever a nontoken creature you control dies,
Augment {2}{G} ({2}{G}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Eager Beaver

When this creature enters, you may untap target permanent.

Half-Squirrel, Half-

Whenever a nontoken creature enters,
Augment {G} ({G}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Shellephant

{0}: Choose one. You may activate this ability while Shellephant is in any zone.
• Shellephant has base power and toughness 1/4.
• Shellephant has base power and toughness 3/3.

Druid of the Sacred Beaker

{T}: Add {G} for each Crossbreed Labs watermark among permanents you control.

Clever Combo

Search your library for a host card or a card with augment, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Ineffable Blessing

As Ineffable Blessing enters, choose Flavorful or Bland.
• Flavorful — Whenever a creature with flavor text enters under your control, draw a card.
• Bland — Whenever a creature without flavor text enters under your control, draw a card.

Hydradoodle

As Hydradoodle enters, roll X six-sided dice. Hydradoodle enters with a number of +1/+1 counters on it equal to the total of those results.
Reach, trample

Multi-Headed

At the beginning of each end step, if you rolled a die this turn,
Augment {4}{G} ({4}{G}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Flock of Rabid Sheep

Flip X coins. For each flip you win, create a 2/2 green Sheep creature token named Rabid Sheep.

Slaying Mantis

Just a second (As long as this spell is on the stack, players can't move permanents.)
Slaying Mantis enters by being thrown from a distance of at least three feet.
When Slaying Mantis enters, it fights each creature an opponent controls that it touched as it entered.

Mother Kangaroo

When this creature enters, roll a six-sided die. Put a number of +1/+1 counters on this creature equal to the result.

Stone-Cold Basilisk

Whenever Stone-Cold Basilisk blocks or becomes blocked by a creature with fewer letters in its name, destroy that creature at end of combat. (Punctuation and spaces aren't letters.)
Whenever an opponent reads Stone-Cold Basilisk, that player is turned to stone until end of turn. Stoned players can't attack, block, cast spells, or activate abilities.

Wild Crocodile

When this creature enters, search your library for a basic land card, reveal it, put it into your hand, then shuffle.

Selfie Preservation

Search your library for a basic land card and reveal it. If there's a tree in its art, put it onto the battlefield tapped. Otherwise, put it into your hand. Then shuffle.

Really Epic Punch

Target creature you control gets +2/+2 if it's a host or has augment. Then it fights target creature you don't control.

Land Aid '04

Search your library for a basic land card, put that card onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle. If you sang a song the whole time you were searching and shuffling, you may untap that land.

Better Than One

A person outside the game becomes your teammate. (Choose any number of cards in your hand, on top of your library, or on the battlefield under your control. Those cards become your teammate's hand, library, and permanents, respectively.)

Secret Base

{T}: Add {C}.
{T}: Add one mana of any color. Spend this mana only to cast a spell that shares a watermark with Secret Base.

Angelic Rocket

Flying
When this creature enters, you may destroy target nonland permanent.

Gnome-Made Engine

When this creature enters, create a 1/1 colorless Gnome artifact creature token.

Voracious Vacuum

When this creature enters, put a +1/+1 counter on target creature.

Steam-Powered

{5}:
Augment {4} ({4}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Robo-

At the beginning of each end step, if an artifact entered the battlefield under your control this turn,
Augment {2} ({2}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)

Labro Bot

When this creature enters, return target host card or card with augment from your graveyard to your hand.

Kindslaver

{5}, {T}, Sacrifice Kindslaver: A person outside the game controls target player during that player's next turn. Neither player may advise that person until the end of that turn.

Modular Monstrosity

Whenever an opponent casts a spell, you have five seconds to choose a keyword you haven't chosen for a card named Modular Monstrosity today that's been printed on a creature card. If you do, Modular Monstrosity gains that ability. Otherwise, Modular Monstrosity loses all keyword abilities.

Bronze Calendar

Spells you cast cost {1} less to cast.
You must speak in a voice other than your normal voice.
When you speak in your normal voice, sacrifice Bronze Calendar.

Plains

Forest

Sol Ring

Arcane Signet

{T}: Add one mana of any color in your commander's color identity.

Llanowar Elves

Swords to Plowshares

Exile target creature. Its controller gains life equal to its power.

Path to Exile

Exile target creature. Its controller may search their library for a basic land card, put that card onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle.

Farewell

Choose one or more —
• Exile all artifacts.
• Exile all creatures.
• Exile all enchantments.
• Exile all graveyards.

Craterhoof Behemoth

Haste
When Craterhoof Behemoth enters, creatures you control gain trample and get +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the number of creatures you control.

Gluntch, the Bestower

Flying
At the beginning of your end step, choose a player. They put two +1/+1 counters on a creature they control. Choose a second player to draw a card. Then choose a third player to create two Treasure tokens.

Beast Within

Destroy target permanent. Its controller creates a 3/3 green Beast creature token.

Generous Gift

Destroy target permanent. Its controller creates a 3/3 green Elephant creature token.

Heroic Intervention

Permanents you control gain hexproof and indestructible until end of turn.

Cut a Deal

Each opponent draws a card, then you draw a card for each opponent who drew a card this way.

Esper Sentinel

Whenever an opponent casts their first noncreature spell each turn, draw a card unless that player pays {X}, where X is Esper Sentinel's power.

Harmonize

Greater Good

Sacrifice a creature: Draw cards equal to the sacrificed creature's power, then discard three cards.

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