R&D's Secret Lair

Play cards as written. Ignore all errata.
{T}: Add {C}. (This mana is still added to your mana pool.)

Ashnod's Coupon

{T}, Sacrifice Ashnod's Coupon: Target player gets you target drink. You pay any costs for the drink.

Death or Glory

Separate all creature cards in your graveyard into two piles. Exile the pile of an opponent's choice and return the other to the battlefield.

Frankie Peanuts

At the beginning of your upkeep, you may ask target player a yes-or-no question. If you do, that player answers the question truthfully and abides by that answer if able until end of turn.

Generous Gift

Destroy target permanent. Its controller creates a 3/3 green Elephant creature token.

Custodi Squire

Flying
Will of the council — When Custodi Squire enters, starting with you, each player votes for an artifact, creature, or enchantment card in your graveyard. Return each card with the most votes or tied for most votes to your hand.

Staying Power

"Until end of turn" and "this turn" effects don't end.

Strionic Resonator

{2}, {T}: Copy target triggered ability you control. You may choose new targets for the copy. (A triggered ability uses the words "when," "whenever," or "at.")

Crib Swap

Changeling (This card is every creature type.)
Exile target creature. Its controller creates a 1/1 colorless Shapeshifter creature token with changeling.

Conversion

At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Conversion unless you pay {W}{W}.
All Mountains are Plains.

Fight or Flight

At the beginning of combat on each opponent's turn, separate all creatures that player controls into two piles. Only creatures in the pile of their choice can attack this turn.

Council's Judgment

Will of the council — Starting with you, each player votes for a nonland permanent you don't control. Exile each permanent with the most votes or tied for most votes.

Cataclysm

Each player chooses from among the permanents they control an artifact, a creature, an enchantment, and a land, then sacrifices the rest.

Ghost Vacuum

{T}: Exile target card from a graveyard.
{6}, {T}, Sacrifice Ghost Vacuum: Put each creature card exiled with Ghost Vacuum onto the battlefield under your control with a flying counter on it. Each of them is a 1/1 Spirit in addition to its other types. Activate only as a sorcery.

Grimoire of the Dead

{1}, {T}, Discard a card: Put a study counter on Grimoire of the Dead.
{T}, Remove three study counters from Grimoire of the Dead and sacrifice it: Put all creature cards from all graveyards onto the battlefield under your control. They're black Zombies in addition to their other colors and types.

Helm of the Host

At the beginning of combat on your turn, create a token that's a copy of equipped creature, except the token isn't legendary. That token gains haste.
Equip {5}

Guard Duty

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature has defender.

Buy Your Silence

Exile target nonland permanent. Its controller creates a Treasure token. (It's an artifact with "{T}, Sacrifice this artifact: Add one mana of any color.")

Lieutenants of the Guard

Council's dilemma — When Lieutenants of the Guard enters, starting with you, each player votes for strength or numbers. Put a +1/+1 counter on Lieutenants of the Guard for each strength vote and create a 1/1 white Soldier creature token for each numbers vote.

Oracle en-Vec

{T}: Target opponent chooses any number of creatures they control. During that player's next turn, the chosen creatures attack if able, and other creatures can't attack. At the beginning of that turn's end step, destroy each of the chosen creatures that didn't attack this turn. Activate only during your turn.

Cataclysmic Gearhulk

Vigilance
When Cataclysmic Gearhulk enters, each player chooses an artifact, a creature, an enchantment, and a planeswalker from among the nonland permanents they control, then sacrifices the rest.

Trial of a Time Lord

(As this Saga enters and after your draw step, add a lore counter. Sacrifice after IV.)
I, II, III — Exile target nontoken creature an opponent controls until Trial of a Time Lord leaves the battlefield.
IV — Starting with you, each player votes for innocent or guilty. If guilty gets more votes, the owner of each card exiled with Trial of a Time Lord puts that card on the bottom of their library.

Regna's Sanction

For each player, choose friend or foe. Each friend puts a +1/+1 counter on each creature they control. Each foe chooses one untapped creature they control, then taps the rest.

Fortunate Few

Choose a nonland permanent you don't control, then each other player chooses a nonland permanent they don't control that hasn't been chosen this way. Destroy all other nonland permanents.

Ballot Broker

While voting, you may vote an additional time. (The votes can be for different choices or for the same choice.)

Brago's Representative

While voting, you get an additional vote. (The votes can be for different choices or for the same choice.)

Gimme Five

You gain 1 life for each person who high-fives you in the next thirty seconds. Each player in an Un-game who high-fives you gains 1 life. (Offer high fives. Don't hit people.)

Rabble Rousing

Hideaway 5 (When this enchantment enters, look at the top five cards of your library, exile one face down, then put the rest on the bottom in a random order.)
Whenever you attack with one or more creatures, create that many 1/1 green and white Citizen creature tokens. Then if you control ten or more creatures, you may play the exiled card without paying its mana cost.

Enroll in the Coalition

You are a Flagbearer.
While choosing targets as part of casting a spell or activating an ability, your opponents must choose at least one Flagbearer if able.

Identify the Culprit

Secretly chose a creature target opponent controls. Then, that player guesses which creature it is. Reveal the chosen creature. If they guessed incorrectly, exile the creature you chose. Otherwise, return Identify the Culprit to its owner's hand and you can't cast it again this turn.

Head to Head

You and target opponent play Seven Questions with the top card of that player's library. If you win, prevent all damage that would be dealt this turn by a source of your choice. (To play Seven Questions, that player looks at the card, then you ask up to six yes-or-no questions about the card that they answer truthfully. You guess the card's name—that's question seven—then the player reveals the card.)

Yes Man, Personal Securitron

{T}: Target opponent gains control of Yes Man, Personal Securitron. When they do, you draw two cards and put a quest counter on Yes Man. Activate only during your turn.
Wild Card — When Yes Man leaves the battlefield, its owner creates a tapped 1/1 white Soldier creature token for each quest counter on it.

Knockout Blow

This spell costs {2} less to cast if it targets a red creature.
Knockout Blow deals 4 damage to target attacking or blocking creature and you gain 2 life.

Hold for Ransom

Enchant creature
Enchanted creature can't attack or block and has "{7}: Hold for Ransom's controller sacrifices it and draws a card. Activate only as a sorcery."

I'm Rubber, You're Glue

When you speak in non-rhyming sentences, sacrifice I'm Rubber, You're Glue.
Say "I'm rubber, you're glue. Everything bounces off me and sticks to you": Change the target of target spell or ability that targets only you.

Cut a Deal

Each opponent draws a card, then you draw a card for each opponent who drew a card this way.

Speakeasy Server

Flying
When Speakeasy Server enters, you gain 1 life for each other creature you control.

Rumor Gatherer

Alliance — Whenever another creature you control enters, scry 1. If this is the second time this ability has resolved this turn, draw a card instead.

Apothecary White

Vigilance
Whenever you attack, you create a Food token for each player being attacked. (It's an artifact with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.")
{W}, {T}, Tap X untapped Foods you control: Create X 1/1 white Human creature tokens.

Mysterious Limousine

Whenever Mysterious Limousine enters or attacks, exile up to one other target creature until Mysterious Limousine leaves the battlefield. If a creature is put into exile this way, return each other card exiled with Mysterious Limousine to the battlefield under its owner's control.
Crew 2

Oddly Uneven

Choose one —
• Destroy each creature with an odd number of words in its name. (Hyphenated words are one word.)
• Destroy each creature with an even number of words in its name.

AWOL

Exile target attacking creature. Then remove it from the game. Then put it into the absolutely-removed-from-the-freaking-game-forever zone.

Double Dip

Choose another player. You gain 5 life. At the beginning of the first upkeep in your next game with that player, you gain 5 life.

Thalia, Guardian of Thraben

First strike
Noncreature spells cost {1} more to cast.

Obeka, Splitter of Seconds

Menace
Whenever Obeka, Splitter of Seconds deals combat damage to a player, you get that many additional upkeep steps after this phase.

Late to Dinner

Return target creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield. Create a Food token. (It's an artifact with "{2}, {T}, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.")

My First Tome

{1}, {T}: Say the flavor text on a card in your hand. Target opponent guesses that card's name. You may reveal that card. If you do and they guessed wrong, you draw a card.

Prowl, Stoic Strategist

More Than Meets the Eye {2}{W} (You may cast this card converted for {2}{W}.)
Whenever Prowl attacks, exile up to one other target tapped creature or Vehicle. For as long as that card remains exiled, its owner may play it.
Whenever a player plays a card exiled with Prowl, you draw a card and convert Prowl.

Prowl, Pursuit Vehicle

Living metal (During your turn, this Vehicle is also a creature.)
Whenever another creature or Vehicle you control enters, put a +1/+1 counter on Prowl. If this is the second time this ability has resolved this turn, convert Prowl.

Prowl, Stoic Strategist // Prowl, Pursuit Vehicle

Coercive Portal

Will of the council — At the beginning of your upkeep, starting with you, each player votes for carnage or homage. If carnage gets more votes, sacrifice Coercive Portal and destroy all nonland permanents. If homage gets more votes or the vote is tied, draw a card.

Tax Collector

When Tax Collector enters, choose one —
• Tax — Until your next turn, spells your opponents cast cost {1} more to cast.
• Arrest — Detain target creature an opponent controls. (Until your next turn, that creature can't attack or block and its activated abilities can't be activated.)

Tax Taker

Whenever an opponent pays a tax from a spell or permanent you control, create a number of Treasure tokens equal to the amount of mana they paid. (This happens each time a spell you control or an ability of a permanent you control causes an opponent to pay extra mana. Cards that can tax opponents include Mana Tithe, Esper Sentinel, and Ghostly Prison.)

Chronobot

When Chronobot enters, switch upkeep steps with target opponent for as long as it remains on the battlefield. (You take your upkeep on their turn, and they take their upkeep on your turn.)

Lithoform Engine

{2}, {T}: Copy target activated or triggered ability you control. You may choose new targets for the copy.
{3}, {T}: Copy target instant or sorcery spell you control. You may choose new targets for the copy.
{4}, {T}: Copy target permanent spell you control. (The copy becomes a token.)

Devastating Mastery

You may pay {2}{W}{W} rather than pay this spell's mana cost.
If the {2}{W}{W} cost was paid, an opponent chooses up to two nonland permanents they control and returns them to their owner's hand.
Destroy all nonland permanents.

Council Guardian

Will of the council — When Council Guardian enters, starting with you, each player votes for blue, black, red, or green. Council Guardian gains protection from each color with the most votes or tied for most votes.

Liar's Pendulum

{2}, {T}: Choose a card name. Target opponent guesses whether a card with that name is in your hand. You may reveal your hand. If you do and your opponent guessed wrong, draw a card.

Divine Reckoning

Each player chooses a creature they control. Destroy the rest.
Flashback {5}{W}{W} (You may cast this card from your graveyard for its flashback cost. Then exile it.)

You, Magic Playtester

{T}: Choose target playtest card. Increase or decrease a number of your choice on it by one for as long as it remains on the stack or battlefield.
{W}{U}{B}{R}{G}: Reveal the top 8 cards of your library. Put each playtest card among them into your hand, and the rest on the bottom of your library in a random order.

Teleportation Circle

At the beginning of your end step, exile up to one target artifact or creature you control, then return that card to the battlefield under its owner's control.

Try-My-Deck Elemental

Flying
Commander spells you cast have demonstrate. (When you cast a commander spell, you may copy it. If you do, choose an opponent to also copy it. The copies become tokens.)
The "legend rule" doesn't apply to commanders you control.

Mystic Barrier

When Mystic Barrier enters and at the beginning of your upkeep, choose left or right.
Each player may attack only the nearest opponent in the last chosen direction and planeswalkers controlled by that opponent.

The Pleasant Taxer

As The Pleasant Taxer enters the battlefield, choose casting creature spells, casting noncreature spells, searching libraries, drawing a card beyond the first each turn, or activating abilities other than mana abilities.
Doing the chosen action costs players {1} more.

Land Tax

At the beginning of your upkeep, if an opponent controls more lands than you, you may search your library for up to three basic land cards, reveal them, put them into your hand, then shuffle.

Monologue Tax

Whenever an opponent casts their second spell each turn, you create a Treasure token.

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