{"ops":[{"insert":"Collector of misplaced socks, champion of staring contests with inanimate objects, and part-time translator for geese. Once accidentally invented a new sandwich that is now banned in three small towns. My hobbies include alphabetizing clouds, holding grudges against door hinges, and writing strongly worded letters to the concept of time. Known in certain circles as “\"Regularly consulted by spoons for career advice.\"\n"}]}